Filtering Values in the Dating Game
Ever noticed that when dating, no one really wants to takethe first step and open up a dialogue on a subject with depthand substance? It would seem only natural to try to obtain such vitalinformation in order to make a reasonable assessment as towhether your date could have potential. However, most people, due to either being too uptight, ormerely too busy playing the "let me put on my best facefront", whether it's you or just a fraction of you, do notprobe for the others' values initially. This, yet not brain surgery, can become quiet a hurdle toovercome even for the most savvy of daters. Unfortunately, it may take many dates to overcome thisobstacle and if you find that this person, is indeed notsomeone worth proceeding with, then guess what? You notonly may have wasted your money, but worst yet, youwasted that precious commodity called time.. Do this enough, and you can see and sympathize with goodpeople who just want to find another good person to spendthe rest of their life with. Certainly, I wouldn't advocate anyone attempting thehard-line approach with a prospective mate by asking themto "not beat around the bush" or to "bottom-line me". This will more than likely cause a seemingly fun lovingperson to simply disregard you due to your edginess. Therfore, if time is one of the most important things in theworld and wasting it is like sleeping on a bed of nails; onewould definitely have to discern that filtering and siftingothers' values prior moving forward, would assist in thiscrazy game. Yes, the days of going on blind dates and getting set up byothers is still alive, but not as alive as it used to be, due tothe Internet, newspapers, and the like. With that said, this emerging concept allows a seeker toalmost be able to pick and choose like shopping at the localgrocery store. This fact may sound crass, but it's true, andthis is where the future of dating is heading, even though youstill will find a more unafraid crowd which some peoplewould call lonely hearts I see this as intelligent people who, when they submitthemselves to a database of others, want to immersethemselves into something worthwhile, sooner than later,instead of getting lost in the potential maze of dating. Of course this is not the only way to filter out bad apples. One could take the classic route and blow off the datingservices, save their money, and forge ahead without thatassistance. There is nothing wrong with this approach, but be preparedto run through many more dead-end dates before finding thatrose among the thorns. If, for example; you find out that your dealing with a personwho does not want children, but it took you several dates tofigure this out, then ascertaining this important fact on thefirst, or at the latest the second date, should be a focus ofyours. In a casual manner, many of important pieces of informationabout another person's value system can be obtainedgenuinely on the first date. The key is not beating them so hard over the head that it'sobvious you have no possibility of being remotely flexible. It's like the same concept of people wanting everyone to askthem for identification because it makes them feel safer fromID theft, even though many of these new safeguards takemore time. People who have similar values as yourself will more thanlikely appreciate your subtle curiosity and up-front persona. Yes, it is a fine line we all walk because we want to come offappealing, yet, we surely need to know certain things inorder to move forward with prospects. Focus from here on out when dating to not only have a goodtime, but to obtain information by asking appropriatequestions over the course of the date, rather thanconcentrating them over a couple of minutes. Without a doubt, this approach will pay dividends in yourrace to capture that perfect someone to stroll down the aislewith. --by Brian Maloney-ValuePrep.comWant to improve your personal values?Get high-quality-relationship advice for guys and gals from a 'Logical' standpoint. Visit ValuePrep - Relationship Advice for Guys & Women **Attn Ezine editors / Site Owners**Feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your website as long as you leave all links in place, do not modify the content and include our resource box as listed above
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
RELATED ARTICLES
The Best Way to Pick Up a Girl You see her across the room. Ah, so attractive. Dating Options for Christian Singles As a Christian, you understand that to visit bars, nightclubs, and many other worldly establishments is not the way for you to meet your mate. The people who hang out there may be nice, but they don't share the same values as you do. What Appeals To Women About Badboys What is it about the attraction of Bad Boys?A lot of women have said they are attracted to bad boys. If you wonder why than read on. Dating Advice for Men: Why Some Women Like Em Younger Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Madonna and Guy Ritchie. Dating Tips: The First Impression Matters Ever had a love at first sight encounter? Totally captured by her beauty the first time you laid your eyes on her? Having sleepless nights thinking about her? That first impression she left with you was sure astonishing wasn't it?The first impression you give plays a very important part in the blooming of a love relationship. It determines the ever possibility of a development of the relationship. How To Repel The Opposite Sex There is a war between the sexes. This war is based on a misunderstanding. Great Tips For A Safe Online Dating Experience Dating can be scary no matter how or where you meet. Maybe he hasn't shaved in five years. Internet Dating - Introduction So you're single. And you don't want to be single any longer. The Dating Game Why is it some people look at dating as a game while other look at it as serious "soul mate searching"? That all depends on what you searching for; a friend, a lover, or are you searching for a true lifetime commitment?The existence of this game makes sense. Most people do not want their choice of mate to be the first person who comes along. Long Distance Dating: Romantic or Frantic? It sounds like something out of a fairy tale. She's in Los Angeles: he's in New York. Dating a Non Christian Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14Any way you look at it, dating can be tricky?especially when religion is involved. Being raised in a Christian home where tradition runs deep, you may find yourself in the midst of a major battle when your heart is given to someone with different beliefs. Does No mean Yes? A recent sexual assault on our campus was a wake-up call to those who thought that our small-town university was safe. But rape by strangers is only one aspect of the problem. 5 Signs Why He Wont Leave His Wife LadiesYes, we all have a friend who is or has been involved with a married man. Perhaps we have been guilty ourselves. Online Dating - 8 Sizzling Tips To Make Your Profile Standout! We know one of the hardest part of creating your profile is describing yourself to others. Dating pearl. Dating After Divorce: Things To Think About Regarding Dating After Divorce Dating after divorce is a much debated topic due to the psychological and emotional impact it can have on people. Dating after divorce can be complex, too often divorcees don't consider the ramifications of dating after divorce before they jump into it with both feet!If you're going to start dating again after you've gotten a divorce, there's quite few things that you should consider beforehand. Dating Personals! Find Out How To Write A Knockout Personal Ad If you're about to leap into dating personals and don't know how to begin to write that knockout dating personal ad, then read further on for some simple steps that will help develop a strategy to create a dating profile that works. Keep in mind this information is based on my personal opinions, and are not taken from any professional dating avenues, so I suggest you read at your own risk!At this point you did your homework and found some really good dating sites that you feel will meet most, if not all, your dating needs. Do Men Want Classy Women? Ladies, this one is for you. Your mother always told you "Don't give away the farm. Dating Advice for Those Just Getting Back on the Dating Wagon! Dating is a daunting prospect, especially for those who've been off the circuit for a while. Here's a little dating advice to help you back on the dating wagon. Relationship Room Just recently, I felt ready to experience change in a particular area of my life but I needed an opportunity to "appear" in order for this change to happen. Because this change would affect so many people, I had to strategically communicate my intent. Best Places to go on a Date Does the waiter know how you like your steak, and more about your love life than you do yourself? You are stuck in a "boring-dates syndrome"! Or perhaps you are conducting a psychological experiment on the people you date, and trying to keep the environment constant.. |
home |
|
| © 2006 |