klub46

Confessions of a Professional Matchmaker


Don't make these mistakes when searching for love online!

"I spent my life searching for the perfect woman. I finally found her but alas, she was searching for the perfect man."

Anonymous

I was a professional matchmaker for several years - trying to help singles meet others with whom they shared common interests and complementary personality traits. I met with my clients in person and they were screened to ascertain their real names, addresses, education, marital status. Most importantly, I tried to help them determine the type of person they were really seeking and that's where most of the problems arose.

Even though my clients verbalized that they were happy to be matched based upon compatibility, this was not true! The major problems I encountered were:

1) A number of clients were seeking others mainly based on appearance.

I would show each new client photos of existing clients based on their characteristics as well as their appearance. Unattractive people sometimes became offended when I matched them with their physical counterparts. A dowdy sixtyish woman asked me, "Is that what you think of me?" when I attempted to match her with men in her age and looks category. Many clients seemed to be totally unaware of how they looked to others and wanted matches that were highly inappropriate. With these people, compatibility had no bearing on their matches. They wanted the best looking people in my book!

2) Some clients refused to compromise - even when matched with someone they liked!

I matched two extremely overweight people who liked each other immediately and went out on several dates. Before their last meeting for a Sunday movie date, the woman asked to meet at 7:00 pm instead of the 5:30 show. The man became annoyed, broke the date, and immediately ended their budding relationship. He, who was a part-time telemarketer, told me he needed time on Sunday evenings "to get ready for his work on Monday." Because she needed to reschedule their date, he was totally turned off to her regardless of his prior interest and their compatibility.

3) Others had a Wish List for their Perfect Person and expected me to find the person on that list for them.

One divorced man in his late 30's expressed a desire for a woman who had a specific type of nose. (Really!) A never-married woman in her early 30's with pale blonde hair and very light skin wanted a man with very, very dark skin (but not an African-American), who earned at minimum $75,000 per year, was not in Sales, had never been married and had no children. I had twelve men who matched her description in my data base but she found something wrong with each one and refused to go out with any of them. She then complained about my service and was upset because she 'had not had even one date'. AARRGGHH!!! An Indian medical student saw her photo and was instantly smitten.

They had many things in common and each was what the other was seeking. He was very excited about meeting her; however, before they met, he wanted a guarantee of a successful relationship which I of course could not give him. They never met and as far as I know, both are still single and searching.....

My advice: Don't shoot yourself in the foot! If you are meeting a lot of people and just can't seem to connect, ask yourself if you really want a relationship. Are you ready and willing to be close with another person? If you constantly find fault with others, ask yourself these questions and be a bit more tolerant. Don't expect to find your perfect person because he or she does not exist. Be happy if you find Ms. or Mr. Almost-Perfect. Good luck!

About The Author

Terri Arnold (Spicy Grandma) has an MS in Counseling and has been a Psychotherapist for over twenty years. She also owned and operated a brick and mortar dating service for several years. Terri now invites you to visit her popular interactive and personalized 50+ dating community at http://www.spicy-senior-singles.com

spicysrsingles@aol.com


MORE RESOURCES:

CNET

YouTube's making a Tinder comedy about dating every last match
CNET
Online dating on apps like Tinder can easily become a series of great dates, bad dates and stupid dates. YouTube Red is turning that idea into a television show with 2018's "Swipe Right" starring Carly Craig, from "American Housewife," Deadline reports.
YouTube Red's next show is a Tinder dating comedyEngadget
Carly Craig's Online Dating Comedy, 'Swipe Right', Gets Greenlight At YouTube RedTubefilter

all 6 news articles »


On dating app, Peoria County men hustled for hundreds of dollars
Peoria Journal Star
PEORIA — In separate incidences, online dating scams targeted two Peoria County men, including one taken for $1,300, police said. On Oct. 13, a 27-year-old rural Peoria man told the Peoria County Sheriff's Office that on the dating app Plenty of Fish ...



Parents' alcohol use can set the stage for teenage dating violence, study finds
Science Daily
"Although teen dating violence is typically viewed as a problem related specifically to adolescent development, our findings indicate that the risk for aggressive behavior and involvement in dating violence are related to stressors experienced much ...

and more »


Mashable

'Boyfriend Dungeon' is a game about dating your weapons and we're already in love
Mashable
Kitfox, the indie studio best known for last year's Moon Hunters, coined the term "shack-and-slash" to describe this singular genre blend of dating sim and adventure game. With a setting that feels very akin to entering the bowels of hell that is ...

and more »


PEOPLE.com

Anna Faris Is Dating Again After Split from Chris Pratt
PEOPLE.com
Anna Faris is getting back into the dating scene following her split from husband Chris Pratt in August. The Mom actress, 40, and cinematographer Michael Barrett, 47, have been spending time together since September after working together on the new ...
Anna Faris New Couple Alert He's a Cinematographer!!TMZ.com
Anna Faris is dating a new man after Chris Pratt splitNew York Daily News
Anna Faris Is Dating Again After Her Separation From Chris PrattGlamour
Bustle -HarpersBAZAAR.com -Extra (blog) -PEOPLE.com
all 108 news articles »


Bloomberg

'Fight for 15' Leader Suspended While Union Investigates Office ...
Bloomberg
Current and former SEIU staff describe a union leader's pattern of relationships with subordinates.

and more »


Fox News

Unofficial in-flight dating app makes joining mile-club a whole lot ...
Fox News
Hooking up 30,000 feet in the air has been made easier with a somewhat-accidental in-flight dating app. This week, Qantas unveiled the Boeing Dreamliner ...

and more »


W Magazine

Fergie on Girl Power, Oprah, and Dating Apps: "That Is Going to Be a Whole New World For Me"
W Magazine
The singer was performing to close out a evening, however, to celebrated an occasion very of 2017: the launch of Bumble Bizz, a brand new aspect of the female-first dating app, which focuses on professional networking. The singer joined the app's ...
Swipe Right for Business Meetings? Bumble to Launch Bumble Bizz in PhillyPhiladelphia magazine

all 8 news articles »


HelloGiggles

10 hilarious dating quotes from celebs
HelloGiggles
Celebrities have been known to blurt out random and unintentionally humorous things in interviews. And although some famous folks refuse to say a peep about their private life, others like Jenny McCarthy and Anna Kendrick aren't afraid to get real ...



HuffPost

Demi Lovato And 11 Other Celebs You May Have Seen On Dating Apps
HuffPost
Lindsay Lohan posted an Instagram about matching with her brother, Michael, on Tinder back in 2013. “Look who I just found on @tinderapp ... hey bro,” she captioned the shot. Lohan's dating history includes Aaron Carter, Wilmer Valderrama and Samantha ...
In 'Simply Complicated,' Demi Lovato Reveals She Uses Dating Apps Just Like Everyone ElseNewsweek
What Is Raya? Everything To Know About The Dating App Demi Lovato Is OnElite Daily
Demi Lovato Says She's Open To Dating Both Men And Women In New DocumentaryNewNowNext
YouTube
all 176 news articles »

Google News

home | Clicky Web Analytics Clicky
© 2006